Stop all the Clocks
Stop all the Clocks
Seventeen years ago, Geordie, John G (our Castle manager) and I were sitting in the Music Room looking forward to lunch. As part of the interview process for a new Head Chef, we had asked our prospective interviewees to come and cook. Paul Brooke Taylor had prepared a menu of beetroot cured salmon followed by a partridge dish and then a chocolate fondant. Absolutely delicious. Afterwards, we sat down for a chat and offered him the role. Not long afterwards, he and his girlfriend Serena moved into a white painted cottage on the edge of Highclere’s gardens.
He told me that he hoped to be at Highclere for 3 to 5 years – he was ambitious, his CV was already impressive. He always asked 110% of himself and set exacting standards. In due course he asked Serena to marry him and naturally, the wedding took place at the Castle, the happiest day, with Richard Walton, the chef who had given him his first job, as his best man.
Four or five years later I was thinking about his career path and wondering when he might say something. However, in contrast to his original statement, from time to time he would ask “Lady C you are not thinking of asking me to move on, are you?” “Never on my part” I would reply. He said “good”, I said “good” and it remained a reassuring quip. He was happy here.
He said he did not think he wanted children but Serena knew otherwise and he could not have loved his son and daughter more. Paul was a huge football fan and Jack has become a very able young footballer. His daughter Amelia is a gymnast and thus much of his time was spent being coach, starting fathers and sons teams, driving to matches and organising charity matches. Memorably even Geordie played for him one freezing February. His family time was always a precious priority.
Walking out of his cottage, the horizon stretches in front of the Castle towards the hills of Oxford and is almost breathtaking, it is so beautiful. Paul would then turn and walk down the drive to the Castle kitchens. He always said he had the best commute in the world.
Life at Highclere has not been boring over the last seventeen years. During this time, Team Highclere has become used to, and adept at dealing with, camera crews filming for Downton or filming behind the scenes at Highclere, the “Real Downton Abbey”. Lesley Nichols, Mrs Patmore has stayed as our guest and also filmed with Paul. He has been filmed cooking for other TV shows and of course was really thrilled to cook with Mary Berry. I think we all loved Mary Berry-very much.
I have written various books in which cooking and recipes played a major part and he and I had to learn how to get along with "chef" during the writing process. He was a chef and I was, and am, just a cook. I had an AGA which he refused to cook on and I couldn’t figure out his ovens. I learnt about his precision and he slightly despaired of my sometimes experimental approach. We tossed pancakes together, swopped stories and had a lot of fun. Food is at the heart of life.
Paul and Luis (our own Mr Carson) would compete to see who had the most photos in any of the books which was hilarious but overall, I would say I probably won anyway. We worked late and I spent a lot of time with him.
In the Castle kitchens, he has ensured that there is an excellent process for producing food for general admission tours when 1,200 people a day visit plus all the afternoon teas. He has created fine dining menus for weddings and board meetings as well as for us and our guests who are from all walks of life, from royalty to Egyptologists, statesmen, musicians, writers, ambassadors, race horse trainers and actors. We have done Christmases, New Year’s Eves, Burns Nights and picnics together, filling every minute with sixty seconds of life well run.
He built a team here with three other chefs, in particular Will and Andy, and Rob, with Raj as KP, as well as being part of our wider team and always adding to John G’s Wednesday meetings with a direct turn of phrase. Sometimes he was scary chef. Two of us might be found at the bottom of the flight of stairs leading to his office arguing about who was going to confess that we had inadvertently sold double the number of afternoon teas we were supposed to. If it were me, I would go up and try to soft soap him by asking about his children and Serena before admitting to whatever the disaster was. I just needed to promise him I would manage it better in the future. Obviously then something else would go wrong - (we had "scone-gate"- my enthusiastic marketing - "christmas-cake"- gate...oh dear..)
The kitchen has been situated in the same place for 1,000 years but today it is a fully equipped modern catering kitchen. I would joke with him about how very expensive he was: wanting the best ovens, freezers and fridges but it was always sensible and future proof. The central space has a huge high domed ceiling which was once painted shiny cream but then an artist and scaffold arrived and it was transformed and painted with blue sky and clouds and there is a star in the east. It is lovely but the star is now rather poignant because Paul has now joined those stars as we have lost him.
Cancer is unbearably cruel and heartbreakingly unfair. There seems to be no rhyme or reason as to who gets it or why, or as to who survives and who doesn’t. The treatments are brutal and awful for both the patient and for the family. Paul was the bravest man we knew and he never gave up over the 20-month span of his illness, always fighting so hard for more time with his family.
His funeral was one of the hardest I have ever been to and almost agonising in its intensity. Richard, his best man, read a poem to say goodbye and, with extraordinary courage, Serena, Jack and Amelia all spoke as well, along with his mother, Viv. Paul himself also spoke directly to us because he had written his own eulogy which was read by his sister and niece.
He was “their North their South,
their East and West,
Their working week and their Sunday rest,
Their noon, their midnight, their talk, their song;
They hoped that he would last for ever, but we are all wrong.”
Once the raw shock of death is over, grief settles in, sitting with us in place of the person we loved. I’m not sure time heals so much as it teaches us how to bear it: it becomes a familiar shadow as we go on breathing and walking. Above all our thoughts remain with his family – his wife and his children.
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176 Comments
This is beautiful. A fitting tribute and memorial.
So so sorry to read this
We want to send our thoughts and best wishes to his family and to you too.
It is an awful thing,
but the memories stay with us forever
Martin. X.
What a heartbreaking but beautiful tribute to what sounds like the most wonderful man.
I am sitting here crying , condolences to all his family and friends and Lady Carnarvon to you as well for bringing this talented man , back in wonderful memories , even to those like myself who never met him in person….
RIP
I am so sorry for your loss. The Highclere family seems to be filled with dedicated and creative staff/friends.
From the other side of the world I feel a great sadness for his family & all who knew & loved him.
How poignant and what a lovely tribute to someone who meant so much to you. I could barely read for years as I very recently lost my beloved sister to the ravages of cancer. I found truth, understanding and comfort from your words. Such a beautiful photo of Paul's family. I pray they stay strong for each other. Thank you.
This brings tears to my eyes this morning. I have dined underneath the canopy of trees at Highclere and although I did not meet this wonderful Chef, your vivid description of his value to you and all that knew him, touched my heart. I’m am profoundly sorry for your loss and you, his family and friends are in my thoughts and prayers.
Oh, what a beautifully written tribute. His craft sustained you and his memory will sustain you in the future. Our deepest sympathies to your family, your staff, and especially his family and those precious children.
What a wonderful story & tribute to Paul. I'm sorry for your loss. May his memory always live on at Highclere.
Very sorry to hear this sad news, thoughts and prayers with his family and friends x
Oh my goodness! I'm in tears. I sadly never got to meet Paul although I have lived in the Park for 20 months. I have eaten his unbelievably delicious meals and met Serena and Jack. His presence is very much felt in Lady Cararvon's Highclere books. I am horribly aware of the huge gap he has left and grieve for his passing.
This piece is unbearably powerful. No man could ask for a better epitaph.
So very sorry to read this sad news, however beautifully written….
Condolences to his family both private and professional.
R.I.P
Tracey & Jim (Perth WA)
Dear Lovely Lady and Lord Carnavon and all at Highclere,
I am deeply saddened by this news and gutted for all of you as well as Paul’s family and friends.
He was such a lovely human. You were so fortunate to have each other.
Until we all see him again-sending love to all.
Bonnie Ashley
I'm so sorry to hear of Paul's death. I feel like I knew him in person through television specials and cookery books. Please convey condolences to his young family.
That was beautifully written and I admit I was completely caught off guard on where your sweet story went. I have never been to your beautiful home but hope to one day. I'm sure he has touched very many lives and am also sure he has become a vital part of your history there as you write about and record everything so well and in such wonderful detail. You have many times mentioned that you are just a present caretaker of this beautiful place and each time I read your weekly article I always think about how blessed this estate is to have your generation tend to it. I would venture to say, based on the books and articles you have written, that here and now we are seeing the best of times for Highclere and again, what a blessing that you and Geordie have the reigns and are taking such great care of it. Thank you for everything.
So incredibly sad:-( All my condolences to you and Paul's family.
May Paul's soul rest in peace.
Thank you for sharing. It’s always sad to say goodbye to a loved one, but if he was a believer then hallelujah for him to be present with the Lord.
I lost my wonderful clever, fun husband to a cancerous brain tumour. He also left a bereft son and daughter. I am so sorry to hear about another family going through this, my heart goes out to them and all of their family, friends and colleagues. When a colleague passes away it is so hard for all of the team where their hole is left. This is a lovely tribute you have written to him. I am so, so sorry to hear of his loss.
Dear Lady Carnarvon, I am so sorry to hear this news. Sending my best wishes to his family and friends.
Oh my. I was certainly not expecting to read something so sad this morning. I am terribly sorry for your loss, Lady Carnarvon, of a friend and colleague. I feel most particularly for Serena and the children. Thank you for sharing this and for writing this stirring tribute.
Suzanne in Georgia (US)
What a tragic news. Reading the happy and full of love life he had for his family, for his job and all of you, I am sure he enjoyed every moment of his journey. Nevertheless when a nice, decent person died there are no words to describe the loss. My condolences to all of you and a prayer for his family to find the strength to live through this time and find peace soon.
Dear Lady Carnarvon,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. Thank you so much for sharing yours and Paul's story. I pray that God will provide you all with comfort in such a time as this ❤️
Not the monday funday I look forward to each week but a beautiful homage to a beautiful man.
So very sad to read this and my condolences go out to you all.
Cancer does not pick out where and to whom it it attacks but in many ways makes us stronger as battles are fought and not always won.
As I read this I am thinking of the whole house of staffers and owners. Grief never leaves us but becomes a pain that we learn to live with. Memories come from small and large incidents and we find solace in them alongside the hurt.
Cherish those still here, hug those that are close and those that are not. Say nothing but be present when required and sometimes not required. The human touch speaks volumes when words cannot.
Thank you for this wonderful tribute for a much loved man, father and friend and of course a brilliant chef.
I was really enjoying this, and I didn't even see it coming. So sad for a wonderful life"Past the second star on the right and straight on till morning"
Peter Pan.
Your all remind us by your beautiful elegy in prose to live the life we love. That's the mission we got by being born. And share the best of us.
Hoffnung und Beileid,
BdC
I read all of your blogs and adore each one but this one is a tear jerker and I am bawling my eyes out. I am a 30 yr cancer survivor..I was very sick but I made it (I had a praying Mother) The other 8 women I was in chemo therapy did not. It is rough when I bump into the families. Thanks for sharing this wonderful life story.
Such beautiful words . So sorry to read this.
As soon as I read Auden's words I knew that they foreshadowed a sad reflection. You have captured such heartfelt loss and shown how you and your Highclere family all work and live so co-operatively and loyally together. I am so sorry for this sad loss for all of you - Paul's extended family, and his immediate family. May you all learn to live as he would wish you to.
A beautiful eulogy. Much peace to you and Chef Paul’s family.
Thank you for sharing, it came through
I love the way you explained grief. “I’m not sure time heals so much as it teaches us how to bear it: it becomes a familiar shadow as we go on breathing and walking.” This is so true. Prayers for God’s comfort as all of the family & friends learn to bear their loss!
Thank you for sharing this. Beautiful!
What a loving tribute to someone who is gone way too soon. My condolences and deepest sympathy to you and his loving family.
Lady C such an eloquent eulogy to a great Chef, Man and Father. Thank you for writing your remembrances and yes a shock of life, departed of such a person is always hard to bear. I enjoyed working with Paul on events and his energy and exacting methods were second to none. I do hope Serena and the family maintain a balance and move forward as we remember what a first rate legacy he contributed to the Castle and those around him. Pax to all. Pat
A very special person who definitely left his mark on people’s hearts. Your story of his life at the castle is beautifully written! Memories are treasures for sure. Our hearts go out to you a great writer and to all his family and friends! Please accept our heartfelt condolences!
I believe no better tribute could be written for an employee, friend or family member, as family it seemed he had become.
He certainly made Highclere proud, as I was fortunate to enjoy a tea after seeing the castle. It was delicious!
God speed Chef Paul, and prayers for his family and all that knew him.
My sincere condolences,
Sheri Almond
Could you please tell is about the large clock pictured on the wall in the kitchen (in the photo with Paul)? Thank you.
How terribly sad this story ..
It came as a shock to read of his death
Lots of love for his family
Emmy
France
What a lovely honor to him & his family your Blog today is.
Best wishes to his widow and children going forward without him and to you and Geordie as well ....
God be with you all. Words fail me.
Cancer took my first wife and my adored sister and two of my best friends. There are no words that make it better. It’s just one step after another.
A sweet and thoughtful tribute to Paul. How wonderful that he enjoyed a lovely life at Highclere, sharing his talents with everyone. Sending love and peace to his family and friends
Lovely the pictures of stop all the clocks and lam fan of Downton Abbey and lovely highcelere castle and did you and lord Carnarvon have a lovely weekend
Dear Lady Carnarvon,
Such a beautiful send off. I, too, did not see it coming and want you to know how sorry I am for your loss. Cooking at his level is an art in my opinion, and we lose so much when an artist leaves us.
My condolences to his beautiful wife and two young children.
Sincerely,
Roberta Fox
Chicago
You always write so beautifully and from the heart. I assumed you were writing a parting tribute to Paul, as after 17 years he was leaving Highclere for his next opportunity. Sadly that is indeed the case, and I am so sorry for the profound loss this must be for you, his beautiful family, and the entire Highclere family.
Written from the heart a beautiful blog
Love and prayers to you all
A beautiful read straight from the heart ,love and prayers to you all
I'm sorry...I was moved by your story
Working in the Catering Industry twenty one years I can relate to the ups and downs of entertaining small and large groups. As I continued reading I was shocked and saddened of Chef Paul’s passing. My condolences to his beautiful family and to your family as well. Such a heartfelt tribute to Chef Paul.
My sympathy to Paul’s family and friends and to you and your family as well. Your tribute to Paul was so beautiful. You have so many memories. May they comfort you
The beautifully penned words within your podcast permitted me to understand from each paragraph of Paul’s journey as and from when he joined the team at Highclere. Learning of his career at your home whether within his professional role or that as a husband, father and of your and Georgdie’s friendship with him led me into a false security that somehow there would be a happy ending to your podcast.
Sadly, it was not to be and learning of Pauls 30 month battle with cancer and of the heartbreaking news that he has passed away was emotionally distressing. It brings home the fragility of our existence and how we should each live life to the fullest each day.
My condolences go to his wife, children family, you Fiona, Georgdie and all his friends at Highclere.
What a heart-warming, heartbreakingly beautiful tribute to a much loved and highly respected wonderful friend, colleague, adversary, son, brother, uncle, husband and father. So much to so many, who touched the lives of many more - rippling out as a stone thrown into a pond. All in all, an incredible human who leaves behind an indelible legacy. I am so incredibly sad to read this today, even though we didn't meet - I do listen to your podcast. I am very sorry for this great loss that the Highclere family are all suffering with Paul's loss but know that you will all rally and support each other. Paul's family, especially, must be incredibly proud of the impact he has had on everyone's lives, with whom he came into contact. Ny condolences to you all
I am so sorry for Paul, his family, and all of you. My condolences. He is gone far too soon. Your tribute to him was beautiful.
I am so sorry for the loss of this lovely man, for you and for his family. Your affection and regard for him is clear and I loved reading about him.
I am so so sorry for your loss. My heartfelt condolences to Chef Paul’s family and friends.
Sincerely,
Katie Beeh
Lady Carnarvon,
Sincere condolences to you and the family of Chef Paul.
I know he will be sorely missed by all. Thank you for
sharing your precious memories. Prayers for comfort and
strength in this difficult time.
D. Sipes
Lady Carnarvon this is a beautiful tribute to what sounded to be an exceptional man. It is both poignant and uplifting. Your anecdotes made me smile, you brought his character and spirit alive with your words. To people who don’t know him you have made him real and that’s so important. Thank you for sharing this wonderful man’s story. He sounded like such a talented character to whom I am sure will be sorely missed. With travelling the path of grief myself (I’ve lost both my parents and my partner in less than a year) my beloved Daniel just five weeks after my precious mother, you have summed it up just right. We never get over grief. We just learn to live with the pain.
What a loving, eloquent, much deserved panegyric. My husband, Perry, and I had the great pleasure of working with Chef Paul in your kitchen during our first visit to Highclere nearly 10 years ago (we'd won first prize in a charity auction - a morning cooking with Paul and Rob and lunch with you and Lord Carnarvon). It was one of the most fun, most memorable experiences of my life. He was a consummate chef but also quick-witted, hilarious and obviously devoted to his family; he never stopped talking about them. You will find a substitute for Paul, but never a duplicate. We are deeply sorry for you, his family, and all who loved him.
So beautifully written, my sincere condolences to all; family, co-workers, friends and acquaintances. A life well lived, Paul will be remembered by many.
Lady C,
I thought I was all cried out, but what beautiful words for my best friend , mischief making chum and chef colleague
Thank you
Richard Walton
My deepest sympathy and condolences to his family and to you and the entire castle staff.
I was so saddened to hear this news!’
I myself was just diagnosed with breast cancer in April and have just finished my first round of treatments and start the 2nd and harder round on Tuesday! Fingers crossed I make it thru this harder chemo!
Cancer does not discriminate! This was a club that I never wanted to be a part of but here we are!
Such a cruel disease!
Our hearts go out to his beautiful family!
I still can't believe it
Such a beautifully written story about a much loved member of your family! I was expecting that the story would lead to a new position that could not be turned down because of the amazing benefits that it would bring. I got a huge lump in my chest when I realized that no, your beloved chef and dear friend had instead, moved on to Heaven.
I’m so sorry for you all. I hope his family always remember the good times. God bless you all. ♥️
I can't begin to go up the stairs to his office...
It is just old and still there..
What a poignant blog. Bless you, your staff and Paul's family during this time of grief.
this is one of the most beautiful eulogies i have every read....i am so sorry for your loss.....
Lady Carnarvon, you wrote a beautiful tribute. Our condolences to his family and friends. We will pray for all who mourn his passing.
Dear Lady Carnarvon,
my deepest sympathy to you and to Chef Paul's family. Grief is the price we pay for love when a loved one dies, which doesn't make bearing it any easier, I know, but love always and remember the happy times, heaven is closer than you think.
God bless Paul, and God Bless you.
Jane Bentley
This is such a beautiful tribute to this clearly beloved talented lovely man, dear friend, father and husband. I am sincerely sorry for your loss.
A lovely remembrance. I'm sad now because your words have brought my husband's continuing battle with cancer front and center. It's amazing how one person's fight for normalcy can "blur the lines" a bit. Thank you for your sensitive thoughts. Paul was obviously loved and respected by many.
The pain of loss is always equal to the depth of love. Unbearable in the pain, bearable in the memories. Good watch over all of you. So sorry for this loss. ❤️❤️
I knew when I read the opening line of the poem that you all had lost someone very dear. My first time hearing the poem was from the movie "Four Weddings & a Funeral". It's what your heart really feels when it is breaking yet the world keeps spinning around you. May his memory be a blessing and comfort to you all in the days and weeks ahead.
Food is the Soul of our life and the precious minds amd hands that prepare it do so with a love that resonates all around them. Being a cancer widow I know this road has and will be very long and unforgiving at times. No one will EVER be able to replace him, both at work, in family and in friend.
May God surround and protect on days when the feelings of loss become almost impeccable.
An amazing and beautiful tribute to an obviously amazing man! Heartfelt prayers from the Terry's from across the pond for his family as well as for you and Lord Carnarvon.
What a beautiful tribute. So very sorry for the loss of such a wonderful person. Cancer is definitely cruel. My son lost his battle with cancer three days after he turned 39. It’s now been 7 years and there isn’t a day goes by that I don’t miss him. Much peace and love to all during these difficult days.
My heart goes out to you and Paul's family. You have written a marvelous tribute to a well loved man. My eyes keep welling up with tears reading your heartfelt words. Cancer is a cruel beast.
Linda Jorgensen Jones
Antioch, California
I’m so very sorry to hear this. He will be missed greatly. How blessed you were to have him in your life. I send much love to you all
Lady Carnarvon,
Your moving words made me feel as if I had known him and then lost a friend. This was beautifully devastating, because he seemed to have a beautiful life that was taken so heartbreakingly. Thank you for sharing and I want to offer my heartfelt condolences.
Ashley Salzman
Portland, OR
Dear Lady Carnarvon,
I am very sad to read about Paul’s passing. Your tribute was beautiful and inspiring to the life Paul lived. I have been following you and watching your videos for years and always enjoyed seeing Paul with you in the kitchens.
I will be thinking and praying for his family and yours. Hugs.
The words you share create a tapestry of connection to a man we never knew but wish we had.
With love, we hope for you all, comfort in this hardest of journeys.
Heather & Walt
I am very sorry for your loss.
May God have Mercy on his soul and may Perpetual Light shine upon him.
Lady Carnarvon,
Thank you for your touching story of Paul, your friend. I didn’t expect the ending of the story, and was suddenly saddened. You were so blessed by having him and his lovely family at Highclere. He was very blessed to be there for his best life’s journey. It’s rare for any two people to have such a fine relationship. My love to you and Geordie for embracing him and his precious wife and children.
Martha
SO SORRY TO HEAR THIS SAD STORY .
Lady Carnarvon,
Saddened by your and his family's loss.
Certain people are sent to us to help us through our journeys through life......He sounds like such a one........
God bless
Angela
for the family. X
Such a sad story and thank you for sharing it with us...
An awful loss to you and especially to his family...
Julie Maria Whiteley
Thank you for that beautiful heart felt tribute to a remarkable man. So sorry for the loss to his family and also to you and the greater Highclere family for a man who was clearly more than just an extraordinary Chef but also a friend.
Dear Lady Fiona
It has been some time since last I left a message in your Highclere mailbox. I have read your weekly newsletter without missing a one. This one was very special with the loss of Paul. I was very touched by your words and felt it was time I responded. My sincerest sympathies to Paul's family and the Highclere family. He will be sorely missed by all his life touched.
They are amazing ..
Thank you Pat - hope you are ok?
We all loved him
Lady Carnarvon,
A lovely tribute to a wonderful friend!
Paul will be remembered always by the people who knew him.
A loving tribute.
Prayers as you all grieve.
Lady Carnarvon, This is a lovely post about such a sad, untimely death. Paul sounds like an extraordinary man in his career, life and with family. My condolences to his family and High Clare family as well. May his memory be a blessing to all. Thank you for sharing his story.
Lovely written
A wonderful tribute
RIP Paul
Hugs to Serena, Jack, Amelia
I'm so sorry for your dear Lady. Loss such as this seems hardest...
Lady Carnarvon, I send my thoughts and prayers to Serena and her family. Cheryl.
I remember the scones! What a beautiful tribute and how my heart goes out to you all!
Such lovely memories- my conferences to all xx
Paul (or 'BT' to his Fat Dad football friends), was the driving force behind our football club. Every week he organised the teams, the pitch, the kit, & the money. And every week he drove an hour every Monday night to run around for 90mins, even in driving snow! The Fat Dads needed BT, as without him we'd just be getting Fatter.
With his passing our duty now; to never forget the man or the impact he had on us. For me, everytime I pull on a football jersey he'll be out there on the pitch with me.
God Speed buddy
Juste un mot pour vous souhaiter mes condoléances à sa famille ainsi qu'a tous ces confrères de travail.
Just a word to wish you my condolences to his family and to all his fellow workers.
As I began reading this my heart was hoping that there was some wonderful surprise coming at the end of your beautifully written account of Paul. But somehow deep down I sensed it was not to be. What a tragedy that this young man was taken from his family and extended family as yourselves. Thank you though for sharing this story, as for some of us who have suffered dreadful losses to cancer, it reminded me to live each day to the fullest as our loved one would have wished.
With deepest sympathies to his beloved family, may he be ever your guiding star.
Thank you for inviting us into your home, and family, for he truly was part of your family, and may our condolences give you all some comfort in the coming months.
It is to fill those sixty seconds.. and just be kind
Thank you for reminding me of that beautiful quote!!!
Beautifully written...cherish the memories.
Oh my goodness, I wasn't expecting that when I started reading.
What a beautiful tribute to a very talented man.
I'm so very sorry for everyone concerned, most especially his poor family. I had never met him, never heard of him until reading your tribute and now I'm crying like a baby - as if I knew him as a close friend.
Sorry just doesn't seem enough but I have no other words
This is one of the most heartfelt and lovely tributes I have ever read. I send our sincere condolences to his own and to his Highclere family. Too sad for words.
I was not expecting that ending! My sincere condolences to you and his family.
What a wonderful tribute to someone who was obviously a wonderful person.
Lady Carnarvon,
Whatever or whomever you write about the reader is drawn in immediately and made to feel part of the story. Same here. I feel like I knew him and his beautiful family personally. My heart is so heavy for you all. God Bless you with peace only He can give.
So sorry for your loss of Paul. I lost my mother June 2023 to cancer so I get that pain I understand. you made me burst into tears Lady. May Jesus Christ Our Lord and Savior bless us all and I'm sure He welcomed Paul into Heaven with open arms. Amen
Oh how heartbreaking it was to read this weeks blog. Paul was such a huge part of the Highclere “family” and we heard much about him that it felt like we knew him too. His passing is devastating for his family and Highclere. Our thoughts are with you all. A very special man who is now your bright “night star”. Rest in peace Paul
Dear Lady Carnarvon I had not expected that ending. If this was a letter it would be washed in my tears. Please give my most heartfelt condolences to his family and to his wider family. We have just been through all this misery with my husband of 59 years. My grown up children are having a very hard and sorrowful time, as are Paul's children and his wife, I am sure. We can stop the clocks..but real time seems to have speeded up and every day rushes by now without our loved ones in an endless and seemingly meaningless tumult. So many thoughts, prayers and condolences to you all.
My deepest condolences to you all at Highclere and particularly to Serena, Amelia and Jack - may he live long in your hearts and memories and in the many recipes he created.
There is feasting in heaven for sure!!!
I'm so sorry to hear about Paul. My condolences to you, Paul's family, and the Highclere family.
Lady Carnarvon, what a wonderful tribute!
I am rarely moved emotionally much by what I read, but your post today did literally move me to tears...
Condolences to you, Paul's family, and everyone who knew him.
John Hanna
Suwanee, GA USA
P.S. Your writing skills have progresses to new heights....!
Beautifully written. I feel like I would have loved to know him. My condolences to his family and to you and Geordie and your staff. I hope the memories of him bring a smile to your face even as you grieve.
Thankyou for this beautiful tribute and deepest sympathy to Paul's family and to all at Highclere. Not a nice story to wake up to in Australia but am sure you all have very happy memories of a very talented man and where there is love, sadly there is also grief which is very hard to bear. Loving sincere sympathy.
So deeply sorry for your loss!
My goodness, that was an unexpected ending of the story. Many prayers for you and all of Paul's Castle family and most importantly, his lovey wife and two children. The hole he has left will be open for a while. There will be many days that you only be able to handle one step at a time.
Again, prayer and love for all.
Lisa Cosgrove
Illinois, US
What a beautiful and heartfelt tribute. My prayers are with his family. May his memory be for a blessing.
Lady Carnarvon,
My condolences There is truly nothing more cruel than cancer. Your story shares the depth of loss shared by you and those who loved Paul. My heart goes out to all of you. ❤️
Beautifully written!!!
Heartfelt condolences to everyone at Highclere and especially to Paul's family.
As a long-time survivor of cancer, I'm scheduled for an appointment soon.
I've learned that not all stories have "All lived happily ever after" endings.
My coping method is to sit and consciously breathe. I offer lessons to others dealing with ongoing/chronic conditions and Dx with required life alterations.
We also can cry together.
Beautiful tribute and I will close with "May the grace of Love part the clouds of grief".
Ida Lee Duplechin
This was utterly heartbreaking to read, and my thoughts go out to Paul's family and everyone who loved him. For almost a decade I filmed many weddings at your splendid castle - I was lucky to be one of the recommended wedding videographers at Highclere - and although I never actually made it to the kitchen in all that time I certainly got to taste the wonderful food Paul and his team presented (we were always, always really looked after when working at Highclere). Rest in Peace.
Sad news. I visited Highclere in 2017. I wish I had had the blessing of meeting him, Lord and Lady Carnarvon, and the staff. It sounds like staff are family at Highclere. Deepest condolences to all.
A beautiful remembrance of an obviously loved friend.
I wish Paul’s family, you and your family, and all his friends the comfort of many happy memories.
“Stop all the clocks.” The poem never fails to bring a tear.
Condolences to all at Highclere.
Sending our heartfelt sympathies from afar. Thank you for writing of him so eloquently and making all who love Highclere feel included at this sad time for his family and colleagues alike.
The night sky has another star
He was so organised ...I can rememeber those evenings so well
That was truly beautiful indeed my Lady. As far as I was reading I felt more in sympathy for your lost and what he really meant for you all. My deep condolences for his family and friends.
A wonderful tribute to a much loved and Talented Person
Who was one of your splendid Team, but foremost a dedicated husband and Father.
R.I.P Paul
And Condolences to his Family
So very sad, Paul was such an integral member of your family. We all feel we knew him wherever we live.
His young family are precious and hope they can move forward when the time is right.
Godspeed Paul to your next kitchen x
So sorry to read this latest blog Lady C , Paul sounded a fabulas fella who loved his family and work and the environment he called work , sending all my best wishes to all Paul's family and friends , It hit me with a jolt when I realised Paul had passed away as I originally thought you was telling us about Paul and hid work life at Highclare x
I have only just read your blog. I was so sorry to hear this very sad news and send my condolences. Although tinged with sadness, Paul’s family must be really proud of him and what he achieved. It’s all so raw at the moment but after a while I hope you can all just remember the happy times, of which you describe so many.
God bless his beautiful family.
This saddens me to no end. I was so looking forward to catching a glimpse of him when I visit in September and to eat some of his creations. I'm so sorry for your loss and his family's loss. He was so young. I am deeply saddened.
He was far too young
Oh that we could stop the clock and go back in time
When days were blessed with family and friends of mine
The laughter, fun and adventures are now sweet memories
of looking back through timeless centuries.
How I have grieved too, for the loss of dear ones I knew
But God gives a song of strength to renew
and press on to the glory of eternal days with hope anew.
Bless you Lady Carnarvon and Paul's family
Ali
Our sincere condolences. May his memory forever be a blessing to all those who knew and loved Paul.
So beautifully written Lady Carnarvon. A fine tribute to Paul. As others have commented, makes us feel as if we knew him too. Sending much love to Paul’s family and friends at this challenging time.
I’m so sad to learn of Paul’s death but this is a beautiful and fitting tribute to an amazing man. Please send my love to Serena, Jack and Amelia, and all the Highclere family xxx
I thought that your readers might appreciate the entire poem....It is truly beautiful. RIP Paul.
Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone,
Prevent the dog from barking with a juicy bone,
Silence the pianos and with muffled drum
Bring out the coffin, let the mourners come.
Let aeroplanes circle moaning overhead
Scribbling on the sky the message He Is Dead,
Put crepe bows round the white necks of the public doves,
Let the traffic policemen wear black cotton gloves.
He was my North, my South, my East and West,
My working week and my Sunday rest,
My noon, my midnight, my talk, my song;
I thought that love would last for ever: I was wrong.
The stars are not wanted now: put out every one;
Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun;
Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood;
For nothing now can ever come to any good.
W H Auden
Thank you - it is a beautiful poem
Thank you Nikki
Stop all the clocks, indeed. If only one could. He should be there with you at this moment, doing what he did best. I’m sure he was thankful he did not follow his “five year” plan, and lived out a happy life at Highclere.
I am so sorry for your loss. He sounds like he was a wonderful man, full of spirit and joy. We too had a loss to cancer with our son, Matthew. He too was a wonderful man, full of spirit and joy.
Dear Lady Carnarvon
No words can express the grief you and Lord Carnarvon and the Highclere staff and families must be feeling .
I lost two significant other men in my life sequentially to brain cancer then to pancreatic cancer.
Life goes on eventually but a part of your soul is never quite the same .
My deepest condolences ❤️
Laura Getman
California
My deepest sympathy to Paul's family and to you ... I lost a close friend to cancer early in June and shortly after another beloved friend was diagnosed with one - not to mention our own son's cancer diagnosis back in May. His kind of cancer is 'treatable' so the doctors say, and many friends and acquaintances have reassured us that they have had friends/family with the same cancer who are alive and well now, even many years later. Your words stuck an intimate cord "’I'm not sure time heals so much as it teaches us how to bear it: it becomes a familiar shadow as we go on breathing and walking." I had never thought of time's healing qualities that way, you are so right. Thank you for those wise words.
I cannot even begin to express how sorry I am to hear of Paul’s passing. It is through this blog, videos and countless podcasts that we have got to know the amazing people that are the fabric of Highclere. Prayers for strength and peace are being sent to the family and to all Paul’s friends. . God bless
Michele M. Eastlake Ohio
My condolences. Que Dios lo enga en su gloria
Condolences to all of you on the loss of your chef and friend Paul. Without ever having met him, or even having been to Highclere itself, your words never fail to bring him, and your home, into the present. Hopefully his wife, and children, will be able to stay where they are since it's such a beautiful place.
Prayers for all of you while you grieve, and hopefully, find peace.
God bless you all.
Written beautifully from your heart, but the 2nd paragraph gave me a bad feeling….. I thought No, No, No,… but by the end I was crying ! Breaks my heart, so I can imagine all the grief you all have. Prayers to his family and all who love and miss him.
Barbara, Virginia, USA
My dearested Lady Fiona,
So very , very sad about this... My condolences for the family and friends of
Paul.
ALLAHUAKBAR.
GOD IS GREAT.
Please do research on making your bloodstream PH to be slightly alkaline!!! Cancers connot live in alkaline bodies! They must have acidic bodies to live!!! Sugar is cancers favorite acid!! Please research it and make slight modifications to your diets.
Lady Carnarvon, your closing pargraph made me think of the burden of winding the silent clock and setting the pendulum in motion as one continues after such loss as you have shared here. The very special people whose lives have enriched our own are among the greatest treasures we have gathered. Paul's life is reaching each one of us through your photographs and truly beautiful writing. His spirit and joy for living are inspiring.
I am keeping a copy of your paragraph inside my Book of Common Prayer
Recently, I have read a biography of John Donne: SUPER INFINITE. Donne experienced great losses throughout his life, and yet he never let those shadows stop him. As you said, they stayed with him, and he wrote them into the fabric of his poems and sermons.
Peace be with you.
When someone so young with a life so full, as Paul had, it's even harder to accept. My condolences to your Highclere Family and Paul's family. May the Lord comfort you all and bring you peace.
I agree with that - overall I try to cook with vegetables and meat/fish and cakes etc are for high days and holidays ..
I have just read it too! I was thinking of writing a blog about him
What a beautiful tribute. I am so very sorry for your loss.
Dear Lady Carnarvon,
I am deeply saddened to have read about Chef Paul's passing. I recently watched your documentary about life at Highclere, and I loved all the Highclere staff appearances and stories. I thought what a special place to live and work! Your tribute is so beautiful, and I send my prayers to his family as well as his Highclere family. God Bless you all.
Very sad to read, but sounds as though he found himself at Highclere Castle.
Condolences to his family
Why am I crying over a man I never met? Because you wrote so lovingly about him. I feel as if I knew him, and my heart breaks for his family. Will his wife and children stay on the grounds in that sweet home?
I suspect their life will move on..
Dear Lady Carnarvon,
It is often difficult to express in words the depth of emotion ones' heart experiences. You have done so beautifully, capturing the spirit of a soul so beloved. We, as readers, got a glimpse into the beauty of this human being who touched the lives of so many people. I know his family will treasure this forever.
I am so very sorry for the loss of this remarkable man, who was a friend to many. May your memories give you comfort. This was a touching tribute to Paul. It brought tears to my eyes.
My dear mother and I took the special tour on 3 June 2017. It included a remarkable tea experience. The food was delicious as well as artistic! He probably had a hand in the deliciousness of that remarkable tea experience. May God comfort you, his family, and his friends.
Dear Nathalie
Thank you for your very kind words.
Wishing you a good week.
Best wishes
Lady Carnarvon
Dear Lady Carnarvon:
Thank you for this Monday's blog, and for the beautiful tribute you wrote about Paul and his time as Chef at Highclere Castle.
I followed his story about his cancer, the surgeries, and subsequent treatments on other social media venues. I was sorry to learn of his passing. I wish to express my sympathy to his family, friends, you, Lord Carnarvon, and everyone on the Castle's team.
Until next week, may your happy memories get you through your sad days.
Perpetua Crawford
Thank you Perpetua.
Best wishes
Lady Carnarvon
Beautiful Words concerning your Dear helper.
Today I read the News about the death of Maggie Smith. She visited HCC many times and I know that she has a special place in your heart.
Sorry to hear the news of Paul, worked with him in Bournemouth many years ago, great guy and chef, will be missed
I just learned of Paul's passing today. Paul came to be our celebrity guest chef at the WPSU Connoisseur's Dinner and Auction with Lady Carnarvon's blessing back in 2015 and returned later that year for a special dinner. We had many lovely conversations and I took him shopping to bring back Penn State souvenirs for his children. What a sad turn of life, but a lovely tribute to a truly wonderful person. My condolences to all who loved Paul, especially Serena and the children.
It still seems surreal..
So beautifully written, I feel as if I had met and lost a lifelong friend. A beautiful tribute. Godspeed Paul. My heartfelt condolences to his beautiful family and all of his friends.